Post by Kat on Oct 19, 2017 3:27:59 GMT
With the last of ver words out in the open, the ghost of a feeling tightened in vis chest. Normally that was the sign that a cigarette was needed. But Percy had only two left and those were supposed to last ver until the next Wednesday when Ross gave ver what earnings ve had. Besides, it wasn't as bad as some other times had gotten, when Percy was shaking or curled up in a ball willing the visions to go away. No, as soon as the feeling was present it began to fade, even moreso when Pheobe began to speak.
At first Percy was hesitant to look her way. Even though they had on more than one occasion made eye contact it was not something Percy repeated very often, especially with other people. And ve would rather that tightness in vis chest was completely gone before ve dared look up from the mug of coffee in vis hands. But then Pheobe touched ver. It was light and gentle and honestly was barely even there but it was. Pheobe was touching vis arm, offering a comfort that had seemed out of reach for most of vis life. The act of kindness caused the muscles in vis arm to tense, if only for a moment or two.
But then ve looked at her. What she was saying, what she was offering. It was a validation. She was not shunning ver or saying ve was broken beyond repair or that ve was crazy for thinking the way ve did. No, this was confirmation. It was okay to not be okay. No one can expect someone to see the horrors Percy did and come back being the same way they had always been. No, seeing things like violence and death and hurt changes people. For better or worse. And feeling that way was okay, because it was just being human.
But still, it did not completely change things magically like some fairy tale. As much as that would be nice, the world just didn't work like that. There was still the years of hurt, the years of being pushed aside, the years of being forced to hide anything that did not conform. It did not fix that there, beyond Pheobe's shoulder, in a chair in the corner one of vis fallen comrades was sitting and staring at Percy with a look of judgement.
Even so, her words did speak a level of comfort. Maybe, just maybe. There were people out there that would understand, would sympathize, would allow ver to speak vis mind. People much like this colorful angel that time and time again seemed to be able to guess what was going on in vis head, even if faintly.
At first Percy was hesitant to look her way. Even though they had on more than one occasion made eye contact it was not something Percy repeated very often, especially with other people. And ve would rather that tightness in vis chest was completely gone before ve dared look up from the mug of coffee in vis hands. But then Pheobe touched ver. It was light and gentle and honestly was barely even there but it was. Pheobe was touching vis arm, offering a comfort that had seemed out of reach for most of vis life. The act of kindness caused the muscles in vis arm to tense, if only for a moment or two.
But then ve looked at her. What she was saying, what she was offering. It was a validation. She was not shunning ver or saying ve was broken beyond repair or that ve was crazy for thinking the way ve did. No, this was confirmation. It was okay to not be okay. No one can expect someone to see the horrors Percy did and come back being the same way they had always been. No, seeing things like violence and death and hurt changes people. For better or worse. And feeling that way was okay, because it was just being human.
But still, it did not completely change things magically like some fairy tale. As much as that would be nice, the world just didn't work like that. There was still the years of hurt, the years of being pushed aside, the years of being forced to hide anything that did not conform. It did not fix that there, beyond Pheobe's shoulder, in a chair in the corner one of vis fallen comrades was sitting and staring at Percy with a look of judgement.
Even so, her words did speak a level of comfort. Maybe, just maybe. There were people out there that would understand, would sympathize, would allow ver to speak vis mind. People much like this colorful angel that time and time again seemed to be able to guess what was going on in vis head, even if faintly.